and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
You made out with two different species that night
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
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