My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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