I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place