I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize