My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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