i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
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