hotel room ftw
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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