Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
you would pick up someone in the library
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
