I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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