Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
