you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
