hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize
