I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
