Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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