you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize