Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
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