he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
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