I think I am morally bankrupt
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
