you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
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