This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
