there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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