i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize