Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
