I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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