I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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