Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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