We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
