awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Randomize
