why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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