Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
