i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
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