Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize