Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
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