if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
