I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
The power of my boobs compel you
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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