I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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