he puts the penis in happiness.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
