so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
