But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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