Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Randomize
