So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
