Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize