I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
