He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
