If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
