I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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