Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
