under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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