True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize