he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
And then my night got REAL pukey
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Shame is for Republicans.
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