he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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