I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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